Doing Dishes
This is a strange topic for my very first blog but I understand that you should blog about what’s on your mind. This is what’s on my mind.
I hate to clean up after myself when I go out to eat. I do it though. Like a little robot, I join all the others tidying up our places after paying a hefty price to eat out. I think the reason we all fall into line is because of guilt. We’d feel we’d done something wrong if we didn’t bus our own tables. We’d feel we were bad for breaking some cosmic rule.
I used to think it was a way to keep prices down. Now I think the idea was planted in my head as part of some corporate brainwashing scheme.
One of the main reasons I go out is so I won’t have to clean up. Then there I am, carefully stacking plastic, folding and stuffing paper into my empty cup, and wiping a blob of catsup off the table.
What I really hate are places that give you real dishes (no, I don’t hate real dishes) and then expect you to sort silverware into one bin, dishes into another, and poke your trash in the black hole.
Suddenly I’m back in summer camp where we were required a similar sorting process, or at any of the many hospital cafeterias I frequented when I worked as a nurse. I don’t want to be reminded of all that when I’m dining out.
Sometimes, when my coping quotient is low, I walk out without bussing my table. I learned not to glance back. When I have, I’ve caught scowls and smirks on the faces of fellow robots. The same looks you might see if you used your desert fork to spear your steak at a formal dinner. It’s become a certain etiquette—fast food etiquette, I guess. Those looks used to blow me into guilt-orbit but since I read the book I wrote on Escaping Toxic Guilt, I can exit an eatery with trash on my table proudly.
I don’t like this cultural norm and wish things would change. Do you agree? Can we start a movement? Isn’t that what blogs are for?
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Comments
I guess it depends on the place. If I’m headed to a steak house, I might be able to drop peanuts on the floor, and I DON’T expect to have to clear the table. I’m paying partly for the service as well as the meal. On the other hand, if at Arbys or Taco Bell, I’d rather think that I am helping to keep the price down by handling my owner “paperwork” and feeling OK about it. What I DO hate is when they place the receptacles at the doors. Why not put them by the Refill Drink areas and condiment areas. You’re headed there anyway.
Maybe if it takes real silverwear to eat it, the servers should take care. And if you can pick it up with your hands, using your plastique as merely support, it’s ok to bag it and trash it.
I kind of enjoy going out of my way to make EXTRA mess, and then I like to get out my little bell to ring to have people scurry around and clean up after me. Afterwards I enjoy requesting my favorite wine to be made…by hand…right in front of me. MWWAAHAHAHA!! Ok, just jokes…
Hi David!
Thanks for visiting my blog and posting such an interesting response. I was especially charmed by the “plastique” reference. Hope all is well with you and yours.
My Best,
Susan
To all of you bloggers….I have no earthly idea how this goes much less think about cleaning up after myself at a restuarant. Do I respond to the person before me or…the whole group? Anyway, I guess I look more at not being a convenience or inconvenience for anyone…I really don’t think one way or the other. I will simply do it just to do it. I’m a slob generally, so I suppose its one way to psych myself into doing it at home!! Now..if the meal and service are crappy, then I dump everything on the floor!! (just kidding!) Chris
What a brilliant and moving piece about Spotting! I was very touched by the description of your appreciation of the mountains, and I could just picture the hilarious scene of you all trying to teach your granddaughter to do a somersault! Such moments are the essence of life, and you write about them so beautifully. Thank you for helping me take time to stop and appreciate such moments.
Glad the piece caused you to reflect on the importance of simple moments. It is said that one writes what one needs to learn and that’s certainly true for me. It’s the stopping part that takes a bit of practice! May you remember to pause and may your eyes see bliss in everyday sights when you do. Susan
Hi Gilbert-I am your first blogger. You know me very well and you know I am sort of a clean freak and I have never known why. I thought I just came out that way. I had to laugh because I do the same and now I wonder if I am afraid to be judged for being sloppy and messy because I really do judge it in others. Your Friend, Boo